Hostility and animosity fuels anger. It is detrimental to our health and has negative effects on everyone around us. Anger can be both debilitating and devastating especially when we live with it every day. We feel hopelessness, helplessness and emotionally empty. Sometimes we are so caught up in this negative emotion that we no longer find any joy in living.
When we live with anger, we feel it against our partner, toward others, and toward every slight both real and imagined. We direct it at policies and procedures that challenge us and sometimes direct it at ourselves. The more negative situations we face, the more our anger grows. It eventually accumulates until it becomes totally out of control and takes over our emotional over-all health.
We usually assume our anger is created from contact with whatever or whomever it is currently directed at. Actually, it is the anger that is already within us that causes our belief that the other party is the real enemy. Someone who lives with anger in them every day lives in a paranoid and deeply unsettling frame of mind. This often results in them becoming paranoid, self-centered, and often times, delusional. Denying their anger allows people to keep their real pain and fear under control. The more they fear; the more they deny. Denial can be extremely powerful and can be a very influencing judgment when anger turns to hatred.
Hatred is one of those ugly emotions that tend to stay stuck inside us. Guilt, jealousy, anger, shame, and depression are also emotions that follow this pattern. The longer you feel them, the longer they are stuck inside of you. Until you recognize the real truths/issues causing them, they are virtually impossible to get rid of. Who hasn't heard a child exclaim "I Hate You?" What the child is saying is "I hate how I am feeling right now. But, I don't know what is causing it or how to get rid of it, and I can't deal with it."
According to some psychologists, the Inner Child is the one who feels hatred and needs to strike out and rage. Rage is a pattern that simply fails to accept reality as it really is. The only resolution to this is that you need to face head on your biggest fears and issues. If you avoid these issues long enough, they will come to dominate your life. Thus, you live your life in fear of them and cycle continues.
Anger, rage, and hatred are usually based on unfilled expectations. Generally speaking, these deep-rooted emotions require professional help. If you are in a relationship with someone who exhibits these traits, this is akin to living with conditional love. This relationship becomes manipulative and toxic, and is almost inevitably doomed to fail.
If someone you know is living with any of these issues, please encourage them to seek professional help. Whether from your Doctor, Pastor, or a Mental Health clinic, find the strength required to move beyond this toxic lifestyle.